Friday, May 16, 2008

Unidentified Flying Obamas?

Well, I just returned to Paris from Boston, kicked up my feet on my Eames ottoman and turned on CNN International just in time to catch the tail end of Larry King's program on UFOs (featuring, as usual, a coterie of fantasists with little or no rebuttal from more scientifically informed folks.) Of course, as we all know, the government has been covering up the evidence of alien visitations since at least the 1950s; and as we also know, every new president, when he (or she) comes into office, is given the codes to our nuclear arsenal and a briefing on the real truth about flying saucers.

This means that before we choose a new president, we would be wise to give some thought to which one of the three candidates is best equipped, in terms of maturity, wisdom, and the kind of universal outlook that sensitive intergalactic relations require, to handle the startling truth about UFOs--Clinton, Obama, or McCain. I've given this some careful thought. Hillary Clinton, of course, probably already knows about this from her time as first lady (Bill's discretion is not to be counted on, of course), and, if given the opportunity, might try to get the aliens seated at the Democratic Convention this August. McCain, whose close association with Bush administration policies--including its obsession with secrecy--is well known, would probably pull the veil of secrecy on the alien presence even tighter, although his moderate stand on immigration suggests that he might at least tolerate their presence and not declare interstellar war on them.

That leaves Obama, whose somewhat mild suggestions that we should be talking to Iran and other hostile states was attacked head on yesterday by Bush in a speech to the Israeli Knesset. Could Obama's apparent softness on potential alien invaders leave earth at the mercy of superior beings with advanced technology? Possibly. On the other hand, an Obama presidency might be just what is needed to unite the entire Milky Way. Food for thought.


Jcummings said...

Didn't Reagan once fantasize to Gorbachev about uniting in the face of an alien invasion?

Was he not unintentionally commenting on the Russian/American fear of China?

Michael Balter said...

Quite likely. As we all know, an alien invasion would be just the thing to unite Americans, Russkies, Chinese, Black, white, rich, poor, young, old... even more than the war on terror has.

Woody said...

The Democrats are just playing up something not intended. Obama, if he really believed that what Bush said was aimed at him, should have come out and said that he agreed with Bush on this issue.

I saw a stupid poll on left-wing CNN this morning asking if people agreed with Bush that we "shouldn't talk with our enemies." That would be fine if that's what Bush was saying.

Crazy, out-of-control zealot leaders only understand force and not appeasement. You can't talk with people as crazy as Hitler or Ahmadinejad.

And, it's possible that Clinton or Obama are actually space aliens here to take over the world. They don't quite fit their molds in that Hillary is part man and Obama is part white.